"So what say you now?" I did ok. I'm still thinking about the next one. I endured the pace of pain, pleasure, passion, and patience packaged into one goal: Finish fast. I also realized that most sports don't come close to a marathon. You just keep going. I still can't believe I rand a whole marathon a couple of days ago. 

Do I have extraordinary wisdom now that I've stood on the other side of the finish line? Well...I don't know. I have not learned much about the world and it's stuff while I ran. However I learned a lot about myself.

1. I see more clearly that competition and achievement are two strengths of mine.
   
   
2. I expect the worse and aim high. I was one those foolish nerds in school that anticipated bad grades on papers and exams yet was an "A" student.
   
   
3. I now know that I like new journeys. However I still want a measurement or assessment of where I am in the unfolding. (I was bothered that the mile markers were not visible. In the last miles I didn't really know where I was except somewhere lost and found in determination. After all it turned out ok even thought I didn't have the all the info but I had faith in a few facts.) It was similar picture of this life with God. You're in this journey of adventure with Jesus and you don't know everything - what mile 23 is going to present or where the next gatorade stand is - but you know the destination is your prize, your goal.
   
   
4. I typically have reserves. Though I poured out most of me out that day there was still some left. Just like the days of pitching Little League baseball, I didn't always throw my hardest fastball. I was afraid that it be a bit much and hit the batter. Also in my days of drama I rarely gave the unfiltered offering of myself. I rarely go for broke. It's like knowing how many gallons you have left after the gas-meter hits "E." Next time, I'll be running on fumes.
   
   
5. I believe and proved that quitting is not an option. A couple of times in the later miles the thought of quitting arose - though not for relief. Part of me did not want to see the possibility of failing to reach my goal. "If I quit now, no one will ever know I failed and we can try again later." Give in, I did not. I kept going. There was no turning back. Sometimes I think about those words Jesus said, "He who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is not fit for the kingdom of God."
   
   
6. I could not have finished those 26 miles in that time if I ran by myself. I believe the company of others fueled me (e.g.: the throng of excitement  in the beginning, the cheerful hollering pedestrians, and the the fellow struggling laborers sharing my pain and passion). The short conversations about shoes, cities, and road signs helped us connect with each other. From moment to moment I forgot about me, enjoyed the glorious day, and the persons besides me. When I caught up to people, I would run their pace for a minute and then slowly pull away. When we ran together, there was a peace in our silent conversation of running instep with each other. Enough was said. I knew I was not a lone and was a bit stronger because some with company for the journey.
   
   

Here is the major nugget of the conversation. Larry said in racing 1,000 things will prevent you from winning the race. There are 1,000 distractions of things you could be doing but won't help and there are only 5 things you can do or be.  Those are the 5 things that will help you win the race. Larry continued "...And if you can narrow down the 1,000 distractions to just 100, you will win the race."

 

I have forgotten what it's like to have several songs about Jesus zipping in my short term memory and not just my long term memory. I forgot what it was like to have certain songs penetrate the different contours of my being. So I started listening to more skillful musical art of faith and journey with God. Oh music! Songs are so powerful I forgot this. I love this God and great music encourages me in my faith journey.

 
Now I know why I like Desmond so much. Now we know why he can see the future, how he's apparently in more than one place at the same time,  and why he believed it was his job to save the world. It all makes sense now doesn't it?

A funny thing happened as we began to meet up, hang out and discuss the more important things of life. Usually when my friend was in need of advice or encouragement and I would share some thoughts and scripture with him that turned out to be exactly what I needed to hear, realize, and live. We were experiencing different life scenarios but it seemed as if God was teaching me the same things he was teaching my friend. At least one third of our converations to date have been had these suprises of "ouch" and "ohhhh" moments where I realize some things in me in needs to change or that I have been foolish about God's places in my life and quickly see the error of my ways. 

So in our last conversation. My friend was talking about a dissapointing work situation in the big picture of living a life that pleases the Lord. He said, "I'm willing to lose in order to win." I quickly wrote it down on my dry erase board between the windown and closet.

So this refrain has been bouncing in me for the past week and half and it's starting to rub off on a couple of things. Obviously to be continued.

So back to today. I guess today was a bit different.There as much to be done and had a pocket to do it all but I didn't sweat over it. Instead I took a timeout. I wasn't going to have to run to Back Bay and accomplish an important task. Instead I took out my journal and my Bible and I God had some good hangout time. I journaled out my converation with God and read piece of scripture I've nor read in a very long while. That's how I spend my timeout. Then I enjoyed a few more timeouts through out this busy day. I'm thankful.

This kind of timeout isn't new to me but for some reason today it was very sobering - very different. I think I'm on the edge of one of those life is changing moements and this week will make more sense later. Obviously, to be continued.

So it happened. The alarm struck at 6. I struck it and then I stuck the pillows and sheets for 5 quick snoozes. A half hour later, I was ready for the road. I suited up with layers, fleece running tights, hat, and ski gloves. I was ready for road.

About two miles into my run, my fingertips lost their sensation and my fingers were beginning to suffer. Instead of ignoring my body's plea to quit, I yielded and entered the coffee house that I work at. Ah sweet heat. The place was warm. My newfound warmth suddenly turned harmful. Outside was 10 degrees and inside was 70 and my body was in between facing a fierce adaption, sweat, chills, and confusion. My thoughts were slower than normal and nausea was rising. I knew I need to sit down. I was in shock and at risk of passing out. I finally made it to the front of that long line and was 4 seconds away from buying my tea but I couldn't stand another moment. I quickly sat down.

Minutes later I returned to the line. Jane one of our friendly customers that I've gotten to know over the past year was behind me in line. She's a middle-aged lady, peaceful and well-meaning in her interactions like an individual who lives a balanced, holistic life.  I see her every weekday and share my kindness with her and the other friend/customers I've gotten to know. I ask her how her day will be or what's up in life. So this time we caught up while I was on the other side of the counter. I told her I went into shock when I entered the store and was tried to order a cup of tea. She  encouraged me to return to my seat and offered to pick up my tea. She then refilled my cup of water and wished me well, cautioned me to be wise and healthy, and hoped I had a good weekend. She took a short timeout from her usual Friday schedule to care and be helpful. Thanks for the kindness Jane.